The Ego in Yoga: Comparison and Personal Stories (Part 2) with Byron and Michael

0:00 Welcome back to part 2 of Byron and I deconstructing the topic of what the ego is what it is to us. Our perspective on it, our experience with it, how it affects our lives, how it affects the lives of people around us. And the last thing that we mentioned was my perspective in my story of how naming the ego for ourselves individually and then also allowing it to be exposed, can be very challenging for some people and triggering for many people, but also these touch points.

0:30 Points are really helpful to create the awareness around the ego. So, without further Ado, let's jump right back into the conversation. I think is, as many touch points as you can have to develop awareness around your own ego, the better, I think if you can learn how to do it on your own, without somebody else calling you out will probably trigger you less, it'll be a lot easier.

0:54 I'm gonna be a lot easier. I wouldn't recommend doing it my way, but that's just my story on how that kind of came through because it's Will, you know, you're calling somebody out? You know, by saying, hey, Leonard Leonard's around right now, and you're like, what the fuck?

1:05 This motherfucker just called me out with my ego, right? It's like putting the mirror up, it is, but it's not necessarily true just because somebody else calls it out is what's interesting there or might not be a bad thing or a good thing either. It's just it's an awesome thing.

1:17 I think it's an awesome thing. It's just going to be harder than you know. So this is why because you mentioned to make it relatable for our audience people listening right now. You know I started thinking that's why I'm spending my time explaining what the ego is it so that they can use their own. You know you guys can go on just like help that's my ego. I want this.

1:40 I want a doughnut. That's my ego. That's totally fine. You know whatever you know, here's a story for you. Alright? So acting class I didn't grow up wanting to be an actor. I don't have any stories I told myself about who I wanted to be about Ali. In that world.

2:00 And here I am. I find myself at 23 years old in ela and an acting class now, long story short, and I have had speech, you know, fright of speech and stuff in front of people at that point in my life. And here I am, I don't know how I just, you know that how I got there is a whole different podcast but here I am. And this this acting guy coach.

2:24 Basically looked at me one day after working with me for a few weeks maybe less Yes, and he just looked at me after he gave me some some like feedback. Like, here's I want you to change this, you know, like, well, I need kind of yells at me and like he's really mean and he looked at me and he goes, you don't have an ego. In that moment and I that's when I restructured my thoughts about what is ego and I realized what he was saying, because I was looking around the room.

2:50 And he's got all these people who have stories they told themselves about, who they are as an actor, and how badly, they need this. Or want this career. I didn't have any of that. I just found myself, they're curious and I found yoga at that time.

3:04 Yoga was like my thing freeing me up being, let's try new stuff. You're in a new place and here's the courage yoga dose. Here's your medicinal dose of yoga. We now go to that acting class and be uncomfortable and see what happens, right?

3:15 This is why. I just started to do that all the time. And that moment really stuck with me, obviously, here I am telling you about it and realizing that he basically was saying your teachable, your teachable coachable, because you're not getting in your own way. There is no, I here that's taking something personally, I'm just literally listening to him and just changing, according to what he was saying.

3:39 There wasn't something voice saying, but I learned this From this teacher or this is worked in the past. And what do you know, you're not accomplished? Wow, that's a really good point, really. Good story. Actually to highlight that.

3:51 Mmm, yeah, so I think you just kind of relate that in any aspect, we bring our stories with us everywhere. Mmm, you know, even in the yoga studio, it's huge. People will bring the stories yoga teachers, bring their stories about who they are and how great they are?

4:07 Well like they are. Well I got news for you guys yoga teacher. Rose, you only attract people that like you, so there's your only get to hear all the compliments. Yeah, so there's a whole bunch of people that don't come to your class as well.

4:22 The world might be writing, Yelp reviews about you possibly. Yeah. So, just like, giving yourself the optimal chance to like detach from the ego as much as possible as often as possible, but understand that it also serves a purpose and Summit to communicate with certain people.

4:40 You need it. Actually kinda need it. Sometimes certain people aren't there yet and I need that you go right? Yeah, they mean the egos super important and removing destroying the ego separating separating ourselves from the ego, I find that language can sometimes mislead the gold. The ultimate goal of it I think and you know then there's some people that say making friends with your ego or getting along or recognizing when your egos present and just you know, building a relationship.

5:12 With your ego. Like I don't know these you know guess more hippy-dippy ways of looking at it. So the thing that came to mind when you were talking and this is a question is I can the ego be present when you're not speaking? Absolutely yes, I believe.

5:26 So of course your words are just we're making but we're just moving her mouth right? Using vibration from inside. Okay. So how about another question is the ego more present when we're talking and less obvious or less noticeable, when we're sitting in silence?

5:43 I would say probably so yeah. When we speak, we start to get in our heads, more of who we are in our stories, especially if we haven't spoken in front of many people, Let's say it's one person and this one person you've never spoken in front of, so you're going to have some difficulty, not showing a mask and and in doing that. So yeah, it's so interesting.

6:06 How the all these like podcasts we've done recently, or like, all interchangeable in some ways, like, authenticity and vulnerability, you know, and then going into this one right here, the ego and how they're just related.

6:23 Yeah, you know, it's all kind of connected. Today, you'd only way to get to really be authentic it. So let go of your ego to start to loosen the grip, right? Yeah. I mean that's the whole part of the practice and is all these little touch points, is it?

6:35 There's a reason why we're talking about these things. The relevant during important, you know, you have to have some age some wisdom for most people not only to realize these things and yeah, just in this lifetime, sometimes it's not long enough for everyone, right unfortunately.

6:52 Yeah. So I'm hoping this Audience is is able to see the value in some of this? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. The egos such an interesting thing to me and we obviously can go very deep. I feel like we've kind of waved up and down with the depths of this conversation and I was just thinking maybe it's possible to I mean, typically in a podcast, you go deeper over time but part of me kind of wants to go back and like is there another way we can?

7:21 Like look at this from a little bit more of a superficial, or Or soft surface perspective. So that maybe some people can possibly relate more than connect more with what we said, previously. So any thoughts on that? Yeah, I'm a better yoga teacher than Paul.

7:37 There you go, there's one right there. I mean I said it out loud and I wouldn't say that and I've had thoughts like that before, but I've also had thoughts where he's better than me. Either way, it's the ego. Either way you look at it and then there's other times when I disconnect from that completely and I'm like, I love ball.

7:56 We have a mutual, you know, this relationship that just benefit keeps growing and blossoming into more and more opportunities and potential and it's just more It's amazing. Hmm. So, you know it's like a thought that I really don't have very often that it creeps in sometimes it's that, you know, this is the world we live in and maybe some of that has nothing to do with you at all, and has everything else to do with the environment that you're in, you

8:29 know, Earth. Los Angeles, you know, sir, get down even further, you know your I'm just going for the city and to living in your parents house. I'm just making up scenario into being sequestered into the basement of your parents house, being 27, you know, should be out of the house.

8:50 Here's your environment, your ego gets louder, it's more victim at that point, but if you're able to pull yourself out of that dungeon, then you can start to see the Light a little bit. Sometimes that means just change up your environment first and then your ego will follow you.

9:06 Yeah, it can, it can and getting out of the loop. Yeah. Yeah. It's out of the dungeon, get out of the loop, it's get out of your house. It's like its brain chemistry. Yeah, to me, it's all brain, chemistry. Which goes deeper into emotional chemistry, but I won't do that to you guys right now but the brain chemistry component of being able to switch the neural Pathways.

9:26 So if you're used to something a town that you're not happy in, Try living somewhere else, even if it's not you're not committing for the rest of your lifetime. You can just go for one month, one year, just try to roll the dice follow of an Impulse that feels like an instinct which is actually your intuition, okay? And then just kind of see what happens. And your ego will be loud.

9:50 It'll be loud. It'll say lots of stuff to you don't do it. You can't do it. This isn't who you are your this person or you know the in it's not that moving is the only solution it's like Anything new, try that new yoga studio that you can just mix the mean mix things up. You didn't do it.

10:06 Yeah, you keep walking around the lake to get to, you know, your friend's house, try rowing a boat through the middle of the fucking Lake and see what happens. I'm just these are just the way I think about when I'm in a rut.

10:21 How do I change things up? Yeah, that's that's good. That's smarter way of looking at it. It's very simple, may not be about the ego, exactly. I'm sure it's connected. Yeah, I'm sure it is. Connected. Because I mean thinking of this pandemic and being stuck in situations, locations scenarios that are challenging for a lot of people.

10:45 One of the biggest remedies for probably a lot of people's to get out of it, to get out in nature, to get out of their apartment, to get out of their house, to try a new job. Possibly or, you know, being forced to have to try a new job or being like, I need to get out of this country.

10:58 I want to go visit. I want to go do these other things. Things as opposed to the pandemic creating this little like Loops. These little dungeons is little traps and what kind of effect that has on the ego. Is kind of what I'm thinking.

11:11 It's kind of diving. Dig a little bit deeper again, but just thinking about like what fuels the ego and what helps to keep the E-boat the ego like chill and calm. Yeah. Right. So like what's going to flare up or piss off the ego?

11:26 You know like locking it in a room is going to piss it off or locking in an apartment for 18 months. It's gonna piss it off, maybe possibly. I mean maybe that's who you are and your mind. Well, the reason why I'm bringing this up is, I mean, this is not the same scenario for me but like I've been Quote unquote trapped in Bali for the last two and a half years since the pandemic haven't been able to leave right going home in two weeks and I'm super excited about it, but I'm also not not

11:49 that I've been bitter, but I've just been like, I kind of want to go, you know, like I want to get out of here. I just want to even though I'm excited, I know. I'm going to be excited to come back. Keep your baby. I'm going to be excited to come back to Vale. I'm also just like I need to get out of here to almost like appreciate what is here because I'm kind of getting in that echoic state where I'm just like not as appreciative or just kind of like whiny or like irritable.

12:10 Able to some degree. So it's like, is this fueling that ego? Is that something that needs to be shaken up and it's something like, traveling, exactly shaking it up, was the what kind of what I was thinking? I was like the energy wants to shake.

12:22 We go to sleep, it's an energy, change shift, we meditate. It's an energy shift. We wake up in the morning. We drink coffee. It's an energy shift, right? We take a vacation, it's an energy shift, you know, we drink alcohol, or do something like that.

12:36 It's an energy shift. Our whole existence is just around. Shifting our energy. G. So, the 2012 that not the intro level, but the next level would be to basically notice how your ego responds when shit, doesn't go your way.

12:53 It's an energy shift that you didn't choose, like going to sleep, right? Or whatever it is, drinking your coffee, going to a yoga class that energy shift that you sought out consciously because you prefer, you have a preference, you have a story behind it.

13:08 But what happens when you take that uncomfortable route, where your ego is? Is like in a different perspective. Now, it's like having to take a step back. Who am I? I don't know who I am with this new experience that I really my ego is now, so terrified of being gone or doesn't know what the next step for him. Her is that is basically forces like a combustion like a spontaneous combustion of like internally explodes in right where that can come out as

13:38 extreme, fear extreme anguish anxiety. 80 right, extreme depression. You can also come into massive transformation, right? Complete and utter realization of your potential. So it becomes this like absolutely in my opinion necessary in this lifetime for me and not for everybody, but some people, they just need.

14:04 They need to explore further into like what this existence is about. And for those people, if that resonates for you, you gotta shift your energy and uncomfortable ways. Mmm. That's really interesting getting getting your boat rocked when you're not the one rocking it.

14:21 Yeah. Like I just want my boat to stop. Rocking and like, how how are you going to manage that energy shift? Yeah, man, if this boats a-rockin don't come a-knockin. Yeah sure, yeah, that's super super interesting. Wow, okay, cool, how else should we take this we touched on it in so many different ways? We went really deep.

14:44 We looked at it from a surface level kind of shared my introduction to how he go kind of played into my life. How about you like when was your first like conscious awareness? Of when ego actually like became known to you.

14:56 Like you knew what it was and you have these depths of level of conversation. Was there a particular point or maybe this story or something that can it's hard to really speak on because the depths of conversation, I don't think I had the capacity to go in depth with this for all the most of my life and it's just, you know, I may be the last ten years.

15:14 It's been a lot easier 1510. So maybe like prior to that moment where that one guy was. I mean, I guess, but before before yoga right for you Is it was going to say that the acting example, well that I was 23 and 23 was my biggest moment of Shifting to really thinking about it being like, why this is important, right? Other than just, oh, you got a big ego and it's kind of been burned into your Consciousness to be something that it might not be.

15:43 So, it's just a word that you associate with overconfidence or cocky or, well, you got a big ego. Nobody says, you have an ego. They just have a big ego, right? You have Beautifully, go. He'll be like yeah that's that's C. Then maybe you should start to change the language or I love when he goes present as usually, not might be a little condescending.

16:04 I don't know your heart. The West, totally love when your you go. Interesting conversation. It's so nice. Yeah, yeah. But you know it's come up a lot and it's such a beautiful. It is a beautiful thing to check it. Yeah. Because it feels good to be able to disassociate your eye, something for me for Certain certain times at least now, if you're so strongly committed in attached to that relationship with your ego, like you are committed, you're in a committed relationship, you get a divorce

16:33 the ziggo, it some point, but you're going to feel a lot of suffering, pain stagnation, and at some point, you'll be confronted about this ego, not necessarily by others, but by your, what is coming into your life? What life, you have the quality, and I'm not talking about the quality of your your house or car in the things that you can financially gain from having a big ego, but the actual state of happiness that you're in, So that's why this is important,

17:06 okay, I think it's time to close out this episode. Now that we've reached our 15-minute nugget series limit, but we're going to continue the conversation because this topic is interesting. So, if you're intrigued, as much as I am, I encourage you to listen to the final episode next week on what the ego is, as we deconstruct it further and build a better relationship, friendship connection with our own ego not necessarily Dating or destroying, or you go but

17:33 just allowing ourselves to live harmoniously with our Eco and therefore, improving the quality of our life and likely the quality of life of those around us. Thank you so much for listening, and we'll talk to you next week.

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